Out of the Darkness
by Theia-Eos
Summary: Chocolat never came, and the duke kidnapped Satine... Four months later, she returns, trapped under a shroud of darkness that only Christian can uncover... (okay, stupid summary... don't mind me! just read review...) *COMPLETED with epilogue*
1. Out of the Darkness...Barely

*disclaimer* I own none of these characters; they all belong to the great Baz Lurhman!! Please don't sue, I've got no cash :(  
  
I also don't own the song Come What May, which is used in here.  
  
*author's note* This deals with mature subject matter, such as rape and abuse (so if this offends, don't read!). It's a sort of alternate ending: during the gothic tower scene, Chocolat doesn't come and that's where the story picks up...  
  
Out of the Darkness... Barely  
  
Four months. Four agonizing months, she'd been taken away. Christian stared out the window, hoping, like so many times before, she'd simply appear on the streets. Like so many times before, he was greeted with nothing.  
  
He sat at his typewriter and listened to the steady thud of the rain against the window. He needed to work, but without his muse, nothing came. There was nothing without her. He was nothing. Nothing, cold, dead.  
  
"What if she's dead?" He physically shook the thought from his head. "Don't give up hope. They'll find her."  
  
Not that they were trying. The officers didn't care for the creatures of the Underworld. They didn't care that the bastard Duke took his precious Diamond from him. They didn't care that she'd been kidnapped and probably hurt. They didn't care...  
  
"Come what may..." he whispered into the night. Maybe, just maybe she could hear him and know everything would be alright. "I'll find you love, and I'll never let you out of my sight again."  
  
The door burst open and pulled him from his reverie. Toulouse, wet and out of breath stood in the doorway. His hand clutched his chest in a vain attempt to control his heartbeat.  
  
"Toulouse? What-" he stopped short in realization of what his friend was so agitated about. "Is it her?"  
  
Toulouse could only nod. "Where is she?"  
  
"Awt twe Mouwin but you shwouldn't-"  
  
It was useless. Christian was already down the hall and headed for the Moulin Rouge. His mind was a jumble. His heart was ready to burst out of his chest. But he didn't care about any of it; all that mattered was her.  
  
The Moulin Rouge's entrance grew nearer with every sprint. His legs screamed in protest; he ignored it. He burst through the door and entered the dark dance hall. "Where do I go? Where is she?"  
  
Wherever she was, Christian knew Harold would be with her. "HAROLD! WHERE IS SHE? WHERE'S SATINE?"  
  
The older man slid out of a dark corner. "You can't see her," he told the frantic poet, but he knew Christian wouldn't listen.  
  
"Why not? Where is she?" Panic laced his voice. "Is she..." he managed to choke out, but couldn't bring himself to finish.  
  
"Dead? No Christian. But she might as well be..." Harold spoke softly.  
  
"I... I don't understand. I want to see Satine! Where is she? What's wrong with her?" Christian's eyes filled with tears. "Please..."  
  
Harold was never known to be a compassionate man, but there was a bond between the two he couldn't explain. It would be easier to show him than to tell him.  
  
He led Christian to Satine's old dressing room. The lights were dimmed and Christian could barely make out her sleeping form. Marie was sitting beside her and held her hand tightly. He could hear her muffled sobs. A doctor was on the opposite side of the bed, looking a little pale.  
  
"Satine?" Christian whispered. He didn't dare step closer. "What has he done to you?"  
  
"She's been hurt. There are serious cuts and bruises everywhere, she appears to have barely eaten for a few months and..." the doctor tried his best to tell the boy gently, "there is evidence of heavy abuse."  
  
"What do you mean?" Christian asked fearfully, never taking his eyes off his beloved.  
  
"She's been raped Christian. Repeatedly. She's been beaten and starved like an animal," Harold spat. His fists were clenched in anger, so hard that his knuckles were white. His little Sparrow... harmed like that...  
  
They mutually decided it was best to leave Christian alone with Satine. He only approached her after the door shut. Her face was bruised and swollen; her red lips, cut and bleeding; her hair limp and dull. His breath caught in his throat. He didn't dare touch her, but it hurt how much he wanted to hold her in his arms and cry. But he couldn't, so he sat and sang to her.  
  
"Never knew, I could feel like this.  
  
Like I've never seen the sky before.  
  
Want to vanish inside you kiss  
  
Every day I love you more and more..."  
  
Her eyes fluttered open at the sound of his voice. She was home, and everything would be alright.  
  
Instead of the happy ending he'd hoped for, his brows knit together in confusion. She was searching his face for something she couldn't recognize. Her eyes were clouded. It was Satine, but she was... in some sort of dark place... "In withdrawal? Is that what they call it..."  
  
Satine, the love of his life, didn't recognize him.  
  
"Come what may..." he tried desperately.  
  
Still, her face remained blank. 


	2. Out of the Darkness...Trapped Without Li...

1 Out of the Darkness... Trapped without light  
  
Her, now clouded, blue eyes stared at him for a moment. Soon after, she began shaking uncontrollably as her eyes darted about the room. Tears fell down her cheek when her lids closed, burning the scrapes on her ivory skin.  
  
Christian sat motionless, unsure of what to do. He'd hoped, if not expected, Satine to rush into his arms and hold him tightly as he'd comfort her. He didn't expect this.  
  
He reached out to touch her shoulder and maybe she'd stop crying. Instead, she recoiled fearfully and scrambled off the bed. She frantically crawled as far away from him as possible and curled up in a tight ball.  
  
"Satine? What is it? Tell me what's wrong!"  
  
She tried her best to shut out his panicked voice with her hands. Crying, she rocked herself back and forth, whimpering like a lost puppy. He advanced towards her cautiously. Her eyes were screwed shut; she didn't notice his approach. His hand touched her arm. She was ice cold!  
  
She screamed and scrambled further away from Christian. Distraught, he simply watched her repeat the same gestures as before. "I can't even touch her! Why is she afraid of me?"  
  
At that moment, Harold and the doctor rushed into the room. "What happened? We heard a scream," Zidler demanded. He then saw his little Sparrow in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably; he blanched, becoming as white as her.  
  
"She... I don't know! She woke up and she started shaking and I can't even touch her..." Christian sobbed. "Why is she like that? WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER?"  
  
He was becoming hysterical.  
  
"Just leave her," the doctor advised.  
  
"What? I'm not going to leave her like that! I need to help her!" he yelled, horrified.  
  
"It's best for her! She's been traumatized, and she'll need time to recover," the doctor explained. Christian looked over to Satine; she was still rocking herself, crying. "You may stay in the room with her, just keep your distance."  
  
He nodded solemnly. He would help Satine, no matter what it took. The two other men left again, this time for the night. Christian backed slowly to the chair Marie was sitting on previously, and waited. If he waited long enough, maybe she would come to him, but Satine made no motion of leaving her corner.  
  
***  
  
The night was long and lifeless. She'd stopped crying an hour after Harold and the doctor left, but still remained, unmoving, in the dark corner. She seemed oblivious to Christian's presence. He simply waited patiently for her to fall asleep, so maybe he could get closer. Three hours later, her resistance broke and she fell into a deep slumber.  
  
Christian didn't notice for a good while. His lids were beginning to fall with the heavy burden of sleep. He shook himself awake several times and watched Satine. She literally hadn't move since she first crawled into the corner. If she hadn't begun shaking from the cold, he probably wouldn't have known.  
  
He grabbed the blanket from the bed and dragged it towards Satine. He carefully wrapped it around her and watched as she stirred slightly. A sad smiled appeared on his face. Unsure of what to do next, he sat beside her and watched her with complete adoration. She almost looked like she had four months ago, safe and happy. He reached out to stroke her scratched face and drew a shuddery breath. "How could he have done this?"  
  
They didn't have physical proof that the Duke took Satine that night, but they both disappeared that night from the Gothic Tower. "Driven mad by jealousy..."  
  
Christian suddenly had the irrepressible urge to hold her. She was asleep and couldn't cower away, so what harm could it do? He reached out and pulled her on his lap; her forehead resting in the crook of his neck, his arms wrapped protectively around her. To his surprise, she cuddled against him and sighed contently. "She's so small!" he thought, alarmed.  
  
"I love you Satine, 'til the end of time," he murmured in her hair. She smiled in her sleep. "Maybe she does remember me..." 


	3. Out of the Darkness...Soon the Night's W...

1 Out of the Darkness...Soon the Night Wings Take Flight  
  
The morning rays came to chase Christian from the land of dreams. He blinked several times before becoming accustomed to the morning's brightness. Satine still hadn't moved from his lap. At first, he thought she was still asleep, but later noticed that her eyes were wide open and staring straight in front of her.  
  
He followed her gaze, but she was simply staring at the wall. Puzzled, he voiced her name questioningly several times. Her only response was her hand moving up to cling his shirt. He pulled her closer and she settled in his embrace.  
  
"At least she's not running from me anymore..." he thought. Christian was still confused about her sudden change of behavior. First she won't let him touch her, then she won't let go of him. Not that he minded; he didn't want to let go of her either.  
  
But there was still something wrong. Satine didn't quite seem aware of what was going on around her. All she appeared to know was Christian's presence and how much she felt safe there. Her eyes still had no sparkle, staring, hardly blinking, at a plain wall in front of her.  
  
The moment was broken by the doctor opening the door slowly. He didn't wish to frighten Satine; she was terrorized enough. However, when his eyes met Christian's, he received the shock of his life.  
  
There she was, sitting on the poet's lap, clutching his shirt and cuddled onto him. What a remarkable change from yesterday!  
  
"How is she?" the doctor asked Christian softly.  
  
"I... I honestly don't know. She holding on to me like I'm her lifeline!"  
  
"Yes..." the doctor responded pensively. He observed Satine for a moment more, and nodded in satisfaction. Christian's puzzled expression urged the doctor to explain.  
  
"There are instances when a victim has been traumatized that he or she clings to one person they truly trust. I believe this is what happened now." The doctor paused and remembered something Zidler told him about Christian and Satine. "Harold told me you too were very close. Am I correct?"  
  
Christian nodded.  
  
"She may remember what you had, and now she wants you to help her."  
  
"And... What should I do?" Christian asked. He wanted to be prepared to help Satine to the best of his ability.  
  
"Don't rush her, but try to get her to talk to you. I'll need your help to get her well again."  
  
Christian nodded once again and looked down on Satine. Her eyes hadn't shifted view.  
  
"I think it's time to examine her now," the doctor resolved.  
  
Christian gently placed her on the ground. Before he had the chance to move, she quickly grabbed his hand tightly, her eyes still staring at the wall. He shot a surprised look at the doctor but said nothing. He picked her up as gently as he put her down and carried her to the bed. She still didn't let go of his hand.  
  
"Let's see what we have here..." The doctor reached out and Satine flinched away and cowered onto Christian. She tried to make herself as small as possible, and get as far away from the doctor as she could. When he tried again, Satine began whimpering and shaking her head wildly against Christian's shirt. In return, he wrapped his arms around her and hushed her gently. She quieted immediately.  
  
"Maybe you shouldn't..."  
  
"I agree it's a little soon, but if you could get the chance to examine her, I'd like to know what you've found. Is that alright?" Christian agreed. Before the doctor left, he reminded the poet to get Satine to eat something if he could. The door shut quietly and the lovers were left alone.  
  
"So...Did you want to do anything in particular today?" Christian tried to get a response from her. Nothing.  
  
Discourage, he opted to rock her silently. "At least she's getting better. It's not as I'd hoped, but it's an improvement," he thought.  
  
"Are you hungry?" he tried again. It might have been his imagination, but her hand seemed to squeeze his hand tighter.  
  
"Satine, please. I need you to help me. I hate seeing you like this... I'm so scared that I've lost you forever... Please Satine, if you can just give me a sigh..." His tears fell on her pearly face. "I don't know what to do," he sobbed. His reserve of strength left him then and there, and all there was left was a vulnerable poet crying for his lover.  
  
One tear hit her in the eye. She blinked it away, and with that, almost seemed to recognize her surroundings. Satine freed herself from his grasp and studied his face. Their eyes met; the clouds had cleared. His hand reached out to touch her face.  
  
"Hey..." Christian spoke softly. A smile tugged at the corner of her lips. "Are you hungry?" he tried once more. She nodded reluctantly. She nodded! He's somehow managed to get a response! The joy he felt couldn't possibly be contained, and he rushed to Satine and held her again.  
  
"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" he repeated zealously in her hair. The wings of the night took flight that morning, and Satine was free to feel the dawn. But it wasn't day just quite yet, and Christian had a feeling that the sun was still out of reach. 


	4. Out of the Darkness...Chasing the Sun

*A/N* okay, I lied about the Tuesday thing... even though it's midnight and I should be sleeping...lol. I just couldn't wait!  
  
I don't remember who sings the song I used, nor do I remember the name (or all the lyrics for that matter!) I just thought it would be very fitting. If anyone knows, plz tell me!  
  
Out of the Darkness... Chasing the Sun  
  
Fortune was smiling upon them this morning. In one day, Satine broke free of withdrawal and began trusting Christian. Amazing, impossible, but true.  
  
Marie had brought some breakfast for the both of them, and left immediately after that; Satine still feared everyone else. They both sat on the bed facing each other, with a large plate in the middle. He tore a piece of a croissant off and held it in front of her, but she seemed reluctant to take it.  
  
"What's wrong? These are your favorite Satine!" he exclaimed. She looked down at the bed. A pearly tear fell down her cheek.  
  
"What is it? You said you were hungry... Satine, talk to me, please!" Worry filled him with fear. "Why won't she take it? I don't understand..."  
  
She refused to look at him. He tried to lift her chin so he could make some sort of eye contact, but she pushed him away and curled up in a tight ball. "She's so thin! If she doesn't eat soon she'll wither away...But why won't she take it?"  
  
They stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity; Satine cowering from the food, and Christian, confused and sick with worry, trying to figure out what was wrong with her. She wouldn't say a word to him, so he was on his own. "She's been beaten and starved like an animal" Harold's words echoed in his head. She... wasn't used to eating anymore? No, that couldn't be it. She wasn't allowed to eat before? Obviously, but there was something else...  
  
"She afraid to eat!" The realization struck him directly between the eyes. "That bastard Duke... Whatever he did, he'll pay for it... I swear..." He quelled his anger quickly and tried to find a solution to Satine's eating problem. She was afraid to eat, but she has obviously hungry. She trusted Christian, but was afraid of the food. "A trick? The Duke tricked her with food?" Another realization, this time more shocking than the first. "He starved her, then taunted her with food and..." The mere thought of the Duke tricking Satine into being easily raped made the poet shake with fury.  
  
Irrepressible anger boiled inside him, and the strong urged to hit the wall (only because the Duke wasn't here) was hard to ignore. But Satine caught his eye; he couldn't frighten her like that. The boiling stop instantly, and was replaced with an emotion more powerful than anything: love.  
  
"Hey..." he spoke softly as he approached her. She flinched as his arm brushed against her. He hushed her gently and reassured her, "I'm not going to hurt you, it's alright..."  
  
She lifted her head to look at him. Her eyes mirrored that of a broken woman, lost and afraid. She nodded, letting him know that she believed him. He opened his arms and she gratefully found comfort in them.  
  
"I know you're hungry Satine, and you know you can trust me. I won't force you to eat, but... You need food."  
  
She nodded against him.  
  
"Do you want some croissants now?"  
  
She nodded again. He took the piece her offered her previously and she timidly took it. Still cuddled against Christian, she nibbled on the piece. In a few instants, it was gone. She held up her hand as a sign that she wanted another. He raised his eyebrow at her.  
  
"More?"  
  
She nodded and smiled, like a small child playing a game. He took another piece and held it just above her reach. She pouted like a spoiled two-year-old and crossed her arms.  
  
"First say it: I want more," Christian smiled in spite of the worry building in the back of his mind.  
  
Her lip quivered as she shook her head vigorously. "Why won't she talk?"  
  
Since she came back, she hadn't spoken a word. Christian hadn't noticed before this.  
  
Instead of pressing her to talk, he took the doctor's advice not to rush her. He would be here for her, not to force her to do something she wasn't ready to. He gave her the piece and she smiled happily. At least she was eating.  
  
Christian kissed the top of her head as she nibbled on her second piece. Silence reigned for the rest of the morning. Satine in his arms, slowly eating, and Christian with his thoughts. A song played itself in his mind (or to be more accurate, a part of a song) over and over.  
  
"Want to be free,  
  
Talk to me  
  
I can feel you falling  
  
Wanted to be  
  
All you need..."  
  
He could feel her falling deeper into the darkness. And he felt as though he couldn't save her unless she talked to him. "Maybe I'm not what she needs..." he thought sadly.  
  
"Talk to me, I can feel you falling..." 


	5. Out of the Darkness... Drowning With Fea...

Out of the Darkness... Drowning With Fear  
  
The day was spent doing mostly nothing. Doing nothing more than enjoying each other's company, that is. Breakfast was finished promptly after being started, and Christian had no idea what to do next. How do you talk to someone who won't say a word?  
  
He simply decided to consider it for a moment, waiting for an idea to come. He observed her tenderly as her eyes grew wide at everything she saw; Satine was constantly being amazed about anything and everything.  
  
Her current interest, however, was playing peek-a-boo with a mirror. Knowing this wasn't normal behavior for any adult, Christian's eyebrows creased together, as she continued to giggle at her own reflection. She was acting like a child! And it was definitely scaring him. "Has she gone mad?" he thought fearfully. What would he do without her, the real Satine?  
  
"Satine," he interrupted her game. "Why don't you come here with me?" he suggested once she turned to look at him.  
  
She attempted to skip across the room, but her swollen ankle prevented her from doing much. What should have been a painful experience got nothing more than an annoyed glance from the Sparkling Diamond. Her limp hair bounced on her shoulder, and her smile illuminated her face. She was happy.  
  
She sat beside Christian and looked at him expectantly. He had no idea what now. All he'd wanted was for her to stop playing the game with that mirror. With a stroke of genius (or perhaps just luck) he remembered a conversation they had before Satine was taken. She had a stuffed bear, the only thing she had to remember her father by, hidden in a truck somewhere in this room. Hidden only to spare herself humiliation of being caught with that thing at the Moulin Rouge; it would have made her seem soft, something dangerous in these parts.  
  
"I have a surprise for you," Christian finally said. She smiled in delight and let him disappear into the back of the room. He made sure to be in plain sight, in case she feared being alone, even for a little while. That's where she kept her trunk with her memoirs, she'd told him. But they were hidden somewhere inside, and she hadn't told him how to find them.  
  
Christian opened the trunk and found only dresses. He took them all out and was left in an empty trunk. She did say hidden, didn't she? He scrutinized it while casting a quick glance in Satine's direction; she was staring at him with innocent curiosity. He had to find that toy for her, he said he promised her a surprise. He soon found that the bottom of the trunk lifted off easily, and underneath it was the hidden treasures Satine had told him about, along with the stuffed bear.  
  
He smiled as he picked it up. Maybe something like this would spark another response from her. She squealed happily upon receiving the toy, but did not seem to recognize it. Discouraged and resources spent, he gathered her in his arms and she cuddled onto him willingly. He had this much. "Be thankful for what you have, Christian," he told himself.  
  
Much to his dread, Satine brought her thumb to her mouth and began sucking on it, a habit only toddlers were permitted to have. With the free hand, she held to bear tightly. Christian was on the verge of tears. "Why can't she be well? I don't know what to do anymore..."  
  
Soon enough, Satine was asleep once more in his arms. Christian was left alone with his worry.  
  
***  
  
During the course of the day, both Mary and Harold came to check on them. Satine was asleep for the rest of the day, and Christian refused to eat unless Satine did.  
  
The sun was slowly setting, Montmarte gradually getting darker. The peacefulness of it all managed to appease most of Christian's worries. He was getting drowsy.  
  
He had just nodded off to light sleep when he felt Satine stiffen in his arms and begin to shake violently. She screamed and recoiled halfway across the room. Her frightened whimpers echoed around him.  
  
He went to her, but she cowered further away. Christian knew what to do, although it hurt him to leave her like that: afraid and confused. he nonetheless withdrew back to the bed and heartbreakingly watched her shake madly and cry in a dark corner, alone. She hiccoughing loudly for she had trouble breathing. She was drowning in fear.  
  
To his surprise, Satine suddenly lifted her head, as if waking up. She looked at him and slowly stood. She was still crying and shaking, but she wasn't afraid of him anymore, it seemed. She found solace in his arms, and he rocked her while she cried herself to sleep.  
  
"I can't stand to watch you like this... Please get better for me..." 


	6. Out of the Darkness... She Knows I'm Her...

*A/N* The song used in chapter 4 is called: Here is Gone by the Goo Goo Dolls. Thanks Lady Marguerite Blakeney!!!!  
  
Out of the Darkness... She Knows I'm Here  
  
The rest of the week passed by languidly. Christian spent the day practically babysitting Satine while she continued to act like a two-year- old. He spent the nights holding her while she cried from yet another nightmare.  
  
The doctor visited everyday. He had no explanation for Satine's odd behavior. It was like nothing he'd ever seen before. All they could do was wait for her to find her way out of the fog. The doctor almost told Christian there was no hope, but refrained. There was no evidence she couldn't make it; Christian would save her.  
  
This particular morning started no differently than the rest. The doctor entered the room and saw Satine sitting on the floor, cooing happily at her stuffed bear. Christian sat on the bed and watched her carefully, hoping for a reaction that would let her behave like an adult.  
  
"Any changes?" the doctor asked him in a low voice. Christian shook his head in response.  
  
"Is she going to be okay?" Christian asked the doctor, never taking his eyes off her. His eyes were brimming with tears.  
  
The doctor sighed. He had no idea. "I think it's time to try again."  
  
For the past few days, a new technique to get Satine well again. It consisted of forcing her to relive the events of her kidnapping to force a response. The only thing they'd gotten so far was the same reaction she produced when she had a nightmare, which was better than her behavior now.  
  
Christian called her over and she immediately complied, leaving her toy behind. He smiled faded once she saw the doctor. She stopped and refused to go to Christian as long as the doctor was present.  
  
"Satine, please come here..." She shook her head. Christian got up and went to her. She was shaking!  
  
"No... Please no..." she whispered against him. Christian's jaw dropped in disbelief. The doctor stared, dumbfounded, at the couple standing in front of him. She'd spoken! Somehow, she'd found it in her to speak.  
  
The doctor, judging the progress for the day successful, left the two without a word. Christian was doing a better job than he; it was best to leave them be for now.  
  
"Satine!" Christian exclaimed when he'd found his voice. Their eyes met, both filled with tears.  
  
"I'm so sorry Christian," she whispered, her voice broken by sobs. He held her tightly.  
  
"Whatever for?" he asked gently. Nothing we could think of justified her apology. She simply shook her head in response.  
  
"It's alright..." he comforted. In return, she cuddled against his and closed her eyes. Nothing to fear in his arms. "I just hope you know I'm here for you..."  
  
***  
  
They spent the majority of the day in silence, even though Christian was itching to talk to her. Though he didn't want to rush her, he needed to know what happened.  
  
Night fell and Christian still hadn't found a way to get some answers out of her. He hadn't asked any questions of course, but he had a feeling that all she would say would be: "I'm sorry", like she was doing every now and then.  
  
Satine lay quietly on the bed as Christian's thoughts brewed inside his head. He stopped his thinking after he heard sniffles coming from her.  
  
"Satine?" he inquired. "What's wrong?" When she didn't answer he went to sit at the edge of the bed, hoping she would say something.  
  
"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to... I..." she choked out between sobs.  
  
"There's nothing for you to be sorry about, okay?" No response from her this time.  
  
Christian moved to lay behind her, her back facing him. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly, and whispered in her ear, "It wasn't your fault."  
  
She nodded slowly, but he doubted she believed him. Satine turned to face him, and cuddled onto him.  
  
"I love you Christian."  
  
His heart sang. "I love you too."  
  
They fell asleep after that, and for the first time, no nightmare came to haunt her. 


	7. Out of the Darkness... Give Up the Chase

*A/N* The song used is by Aerosmith (I forget what it's called exactly) but it was the theme song for the movie Armageddon, if that helps.  
  
Out of the Darkness... Give Up the Chase  
  
He awoke the next morning with a brilliant smile plastered on his face. Satine was alright, and sleeping contently in his arms. He watched her, wanting to stay like that forever.  
  
"I could stay awake, just to hear you breathing  
  
Why do you smile when you are sleeping,  
  
While you're far away dreaming?  
  
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender.  
  
I could stay lost in this moment, forever.  
  
Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure..."  
  
Inspiration struck him like a bolt of lighting. He had to write this down. Christian rose slowly as not to wake Satine and went to his typewriter. His belongings had been brought by Chocolat. For the first time in months, words flowed from him and onto paper without effort, just as it was when writing Spectacular Spectacular. His muse had returned to him! Maybe now he could work...  
  
Satine stirred at the sound of the faint clicking of the typewriter's keys. How long had it been since she'd heard that sound? She sat up on the bed and watched him pound feverishly at the keys. Just like she remembered.  
  
Christian heard her stir and stopped his writing immediately. He turned to face her; she was avoiding his eyes. Her slender shoulders where slumped, her small frame was curled up tightly... She looked so unsure.  
  
"Morning love," he exclaimed happily. She flinched at his words.  
  
"Morning,' Satine mumbled. She still wouldn't look at him.  
  
Christian was about to voice something else, but a knock at the door interrupted him. He excused himself and found himself face to face with the doctor.  
  
"I need to speak with you."  
  
They stepped outside Satine's dressing room and shut the door. She didn't seem to care much about Christian's departure.  
  
"I know why miss Satine was acting like a child!"  
  
Christian urged him to continue.  
  
"It's a form of withdrawal, when a patient returns to simpler, happier times in order to escape the pain."  
  
"Pain?" Christian exclaimed. "She wasn't like that the day they found her!"  
  
"Christian," the doctor begun somberly," miss Satine has been through a terrible ordeal, one that was accompanied with many forms of withdrawal. I believe she had surpassed those, but it's not over yet. The next step is depression."  
  
"Depression?"  
  
"Yes. A dark period that will surely pass without a problem with miss Satine. You're doing an excellent job of taking care you of, you know-"  
  
"How can I tell if it's serious?"  
  
"For you? Well, if she won't look at you, she may feel ashamed and feel like she has to do this on her own. Feelings of abandonment, fear, loss of sense of life and so on. Slumped shoulders, lonesome retreats, refusing to talk to a loved one they trust... I once had a patient whose depression was so severe, like the symptoms I just gave, that he tried to kill himself. It was-"  
  
The doctor chattered on but Christian wasn't listening. His heart felt like it would jump out of his chest. "A patient that tried to kill himself?" he thought, panicked. Only one thought sounded in his head: Satine!  
  
He burst through the door and looked over to the bed; Satine was gone!  
  
"No!"  
  
Before he had the chance to make a move, a blood-curling scream emitted from the balcony. "I've just gotten her back! She can't leave me like this now!"  
  
"Satine!" he yelled, like it was literally the end of the world. For Christian, it was. 


	8. Out of the Darkness... Take my Hand

*A/N* You think I'd actually kill her?? Come on ppl, have a little faith! lol anyways, on with the story  
  
The song used in ch. 5 was "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing". I really suck at song titles... thanks to whoever told me!  
  
This is a short one, I know. I'm sorry okay? :P  
  
Out of the Darkness... Take my Hand  
  
"I just got her back! She can't leave me now..."  
  
The two men rushed to the balcony, fearing what they would find. Satine was standing on the edge, her arms spread like the wings of a bird, ready to fly. She hadn't jumped?  
  
Christian looked down at a woman standing in the street, pointing at the red-headed courtesan. The scream had come from her! He looked back at Satine. Her eyes were glazed and unblinking, her arms were still in the air. She looked ready to pounce.  
  
"Satine? Take my hand."  
  
She made no move.  
  
"Take my hand, please," he pleaded.  
  
Ever so slowly, she began to rise on her toes, and falling forward. Christian caught her by the waist just in time. His heart was pounding furiously. The doctor, pale-faced and stunned, stood there gaping stupidly.  
  
"Never did I think it would happen again..."  
  
Christian cradled Satine and shot the doctor a look that could kill. "Why didn't you tell me this could happen before?"  
  
His voice was like ice. Satine began to cry, but Christian was too angry to do anything about it.  
  
"I didn't think it-"  
  
"That's right, you didn't think," Christian spoke venomously. "Get out. I never want to see you near her again."  
  
The doctor was about to protest, but the look in the poet's eyes suggested (strongly) he should leave as soon as possible. He exited, with no dignity left.  
  
Christian grabbed Satine by the hand and practically dragged her to the bed. She fell on it, sobbing. He sat on the corner, his back facing her. He was fuming.  
  
"Chris?" Satine spoke timidly. Her voice was barely above a whisper.  
  
His muscles tense and he didn't answer.  
  
Satine dared to speak again, "Are you angry with me?"  
  
At first, Christian didn't answer. His head turned in her direction slightly, "What do you think?" His voice was harsh, not like it usually was when he spoke to her.  
  
She flinched, and cried desperate tears. He tried not to let it bother him, but that was a lie. He loved her too much to stay angry with her.  
  
"You were going to kill yourself, and you didn't have a thought for me."  
  
"I don't deserve to live anymore," she whispered. "I don't want to live."  
  
"What are you talking about? Satine, do you know what it's been like without you? I can't live without you..."  
  
He turned to face her; she was still crying.  
  
"Why won't you tell me what's wrong?" Christian pleaded, his own eyes filling with tears.  
  
"I'm afraid," she whimpered.  
  
"Of what? There's nothing to fear as long as I'm here, remember that," he reassured her. Satine shook her head.  
  
"I'm afraid you won't love me anymore." She collapsed on the bed with wracking sobs. Christian's heart broke. His anger forgotten, he held her tightly. Unsure, Satine let herself be rocked.  
  
"I'll never stop loving you, 'til the end of time..."  
  
Satine relaxed in his embrace; she believed him with all her heart. She was loved, and she loved in return. 


	9. Out of the Darkness... I Smile and Help ...

*A/N* Wow! 36 reviews!!! :) I'm so happy... keep 'em coming! (and I'll keep adding chapters!)  
  
Out of the Darkness... I Smile and Help Her Stand  
  
Satine felt safer than ever; she never wanted to leave his arms. She smiled and cuddled closer to him as he began humming their song. They stayed like that until the song ended.  
  
"I didn't like that doctor either," Satine said sleepily. Christian chuckled.  
  
His expression suddenly grew serious. "What happen that night?"  
  
Her brows knitted together. Satine knew what he meant, but in attempt to avoid the subject, she asked him what night.  
  
"At the Gothic Tower... When the Duke found out about us..."  
  
Satine shuddered at the mention of the Duke. She shook her head tearfully, "I can't..."  
  
"Can't what? Can't tell me?" His voice had a sudden panicky tone. She nodded.  
  
"Satine please," Christian pleaded, "I need to know what happened..."  
  
"I can't..."  
  
"Don't you trust me?" He sounded hurt.  
  
"I love you. Just... let it go... Please..." Tears began falling on her cheeks once again.  
  
"If you love me you'd trust me."  
  
Satine flinched. She did love him, but she was afraid of what his reaction would be when he found out... However, if she didn't tell him she might lose him, and that thought pushed every doubt aside. Christian loved her, and he was true to his word.  
  
"I was on the balcony in the Tower..." she hesitated. Christian reassured her and pulled her closer to him.  
  
"And I saw you there, and I couldn't do it... I couldn't pretend anymore..." Satine sobbed. "I told him no, and he pulled me inside. He said I would make him believe that I loved him..."  
  
Christian's thoughts blackened. This is where it began, where that bastard Duke hurt his diamond...  
  
"I said no again, and he screamed at me to be quiet. I ran Christian! I really tried to get away but I couldn't..." she apologized. For the first time since she began talking, Satine looked him in the eye. Christian saw genuine worry that he wouldn't believe her.  
  
"I know love... Don't worry," he reassured her.  
  
At peace, she continued her story, "I don't know what happened after that... It was all so blurry. I know he was on me and I hurt everywhere..."  
  
"I woke up later in some sort of jail cell. I was bruised and cut everywhere, and my head hurt. I couldn't walk properly. The Duke then came in..." She was gaining confidence; Christian still hadn't let go of her.  
  
"The Duke came in and," she forced the word out, "raped me again, over and over. By the end, I was more hurt than before. I tried to get away, but I hurt too much... I just couldn't..."  
  
"It's alright..." Christian murmured in her hair.  
  
"After that he hit me, a lot, because I had resisted. He only gave me food when he wanted to..." Satine couldn't say it again. "In the end, I just stopped trying..."  
  
She cried harder know. "I'm so sorry... I didn't want him to... I just couldn't try and get away anymore! It just hurt so much..."  
  
That was why she kept apologizing to him before! She felt incredibly guilty about letting the Duke have her without fighting. Christian was glad she didn't, or she could have ended up dead.  
  
"Don't cry... It wasn't your fault, you hear?"  
  
She shook her head against him, "I should have fought! For you, for us, for..."  
  
"If you'd fought any more I wouldn't be here holding you now," Christian told her. "I'm not angry at you... It's the Duke I'd love to hurt..."  
  
"I love you," she sniffled. He smiled.  
  
"I love you too. You didn't deserve any of it, but your alright now, okay?"  
  
Satine nodded. He let go of her and got off the bed. "I'm happy you told me."  
  
She looked at him and smiled tearfully, "I'm happy I told you."  
  
Christian held out his hand, "let's go for a walk. What do you say?" Satine took it gallantly and let herself be helped up.  
  
"I'd love to."  
  
Her story off her chest, there were no worries for the lovers. There was only the sunset, their love, and all the time in the world.  
  
  
  
*A/N* This isn't the end!!! Just to let you know before you all get pissed at me... :S lol More to come soon!! 


	10. Out of the Darkness... One Step from Hel...

*A/N* I'm sorry for the slow update! The site was down, and on the day it was fixed I left for NYC for a week... So FINALLY, here's chapter 10!

Christian's play is a rip off of Disney's Aladdin, just in case someone notices...

Out of the Darkness... One Step from Hell

Ever since Christian kicked the doctor out, Harold ordered him back to work. Satine accompanied him every morning to the Moulin Rouge, while Christian wrote, rehearsed and directed his new play. Satine sat at a empty table, isolated from the rest, and watched the poet with admiration for hours on end.

This morning was no different; she sat as far away as possible from the rest, her head resting in the crook of her arm on the table. Christian, explaining the Arabian street rat's character, cast a quick eye in the diamond's direction. Her face was pale, and her shoulders slumped. Although always reserved, she looked more depressed than usual.

Alright, that's all for today, Christian concluded quickly. Tomorrow we rehearsed scene four, the princess' escape. 

As an afterthought, he called, Toulouse, I want the stand keeper's song memorized by Monday. You've been at it for weeks! He chuckled at the artist's worried expression.

Satine didn't notice his approach. She jumped at his warm greeting and snapped out of her daydream.

Are you okay?

She nodded slowly; Christian clearly didn't believe her. Before he could voice another thought, however, Marie yelled across the Moulin's dance floor, Harold wants to see you in his office in a few!

Signing, Christian kissed Satine's forehead, I've got to go, but I promise to be back soon. She smiled weakly at him and returned to her daydream.

He's coming.

Satine's haunting voice filled his ears. Christian asked, confused. No answer. She only stared at him with her sparkling blue eyes.

***

The usually silent hall to Zidler's office echoed with muffled voices. Someone was already meeting with him. Christian thought it best to wait until they were finished, so he sat on the chair facing the office door, and waited.

I want my end of the bargain, a familiar voice screamed. An annoyingly nasal voice.

The color drained from Christian's face. It couldn't be him.

I can walk out of this office with the deeds in my pocket, and every single one of you worthless people will be thrown on the streets!

It was. As much as Christian wanted the truth to stay hidden, he couldn't deny it. The duke. In Harold's office, that bastard bargained for Satine like a piece of property.

She will be mine. You will give me to her, or I'll take her like I once did. And we all know how well that turned out.

Christian shook with rage. If the duke touched one hair on her head he would...

He snapped his eyes up at the sound of the opening door. The duke, taken aback by the poet's presence, only snarled in a manner that even a mouse would find comedic. 

Oh. You, was all the duke said before disappearing out the Moulin Rouge's back door down the hall. Harold bade Christian in. He slammed the door in uttermost fury. 

You won't let him touch her!

Christian, I-

If you care the slightest about Satine, you'll keep him away from her, Christian spat.

It's not my choice, Zidler replied sadly. The duke is entitled to her. It's in the contract.

Christian exploded, She's not a piece of property you can fight over! 

Harold only stared down at his desk. 

He hurt her Harold. He'd do it again. If you even care whether she's alive or not, you'd help me protect her.

I'll see what I can do, he said, but nodded in a manner that suggested he'd help Christian. Harold probably knew the duke would be listening to their conversation.

The poet left abruptly after, and returned to Satine in the dance hall. He stopped short, seeing the person he loathed the most at the entrance.

I've come to collect my earnings, the duke said possessively, his eyes riveted to Satine. A choked sob escaped her lips.

This can't be happening. Not again. He can't take Satine away. I won't let him..."


	11. Out of the Darkness... Two to the Day

*A/N* Yay!! the site's working again!! This means I can get reviews... *hint hint* I'm a review addict! Please do it before I start to review myself... lol anyways... enjoy!  
  
Out of the Darkness... Two to the Day  
  
Time slowed, and everything looked like it was underwater. He couldn't breathe. "I've come to collect my earnings."  
  
Satine's chocked sob echoed around him. The Moulin had turned silent, although it seemed impossible considering the amount of people inside.  
  
The duke took a step towards Satine. She sank further back into her chair and glued her eyes on Christian. She was shaking like a leaf! Her mouth moved, but no sound came out. The duke moved closer. Christian stood paralyzed.  
  
"C...Chris..." Satine found her voice and snapped the poet out of it. "Help."  
  
The duke was getting closer; he'd almost reached her.  
  
"Don't worry my sweet. It won't be much worse than last time," the duke whispered in her ear.  
  
Tears ran down Satine's face. Her gaze never wavered from Christian, but he wasn't moving. "Why isn't he helping?" she thought desperately.  
  
"Help!" she yelped loudly. Christian ran as the duke's fist collided with her jaw. She fell to the ground. Raged boiled his blood. No one hurt his diamond. He'd die before it happened again.  
  
"I'll kill you!" he screamed at the duke, who seemed genuinely frightened. Christian had never been a fighter, always steering clear of schoolyard brawls. But no one hurt his diamond.  
  
He punched the duke in the nose. Blood spilled down the duke's shirt as he fell backwards. Christian jumped on him and hit him repeatedly, with more and more fury.  
  
Suddenly, through the chaotic scene, a strong hand grabbed Christian's shoulder and pulled him off the duke. He met Harold's stern face.  
  
"This won't help anything!" he said dangerously, but he softened. "Go protect Satine. I'll deal with him."  
  
Christian obeyed instantly and went to her, pulling her close to him. Still shaking, she grabbed onto his shirt and buried her face in his neck. Everyone stared at the lovers on the floor.  
  
"She's mine Zidler! Mine! I have the contract!"  
  
"Leave, duke. You have no place here."  
  
The duke laughed. "You forget I own you Harold. I own everyone here!" he yelled at the audience that had gathered in the dance hall.  
  
"I won't have you hurting her, just like I won't have you hurting anyone here. Get out." Harold's voice was eerily calm. It only served to further agitate the duke.  
  
"You'll be thrown on the streets! I own all of you!"  
  
And the most unusual thing happened.  
  
"If I'm stuck bein' owned by yer, I quit!" Nini stood defiantly before the duke. She turned to Christian and winked, "Don't worry Shakespeare! He won't get his hands on 'er."  
  
The lovers could only stare at her. This was certainly a first.  
  
"I quit too!" Mome Fromage stood from her seat. More voiced their agreement. But the duke didn't seem to mind. He smiled calmly.  
  
"Fine. Here is your contract Harold," he handed over the neatly folded paper. "But this doesn't mean Satine won't be mine. I will have her," he whispered only loud enough for Harold and Christian to hear. The poet held Satine a little tighter.  
  
He turned on his heels and exited the Moulin Rouge, stopping only at the entrance for a moment, to dismiss Warner.  
  
Nini stared at the duke leaving in puzzlement. "That's it? He's just gonna leave without a fight?"  
  
No one answered her, but they knew it was far from over. The duke wanted Satine, and he would do anything to get her.  
  
Harold turned to face the lovers, and was about to voice something, but Christian stopped him.  
  
"I know Harold. I won't leave her out of my sight for a second."  
  
Christian helped Satine up. "Are you okay?" he asked, examining her jaw. She nodded tearfully before pulling herself closer to him. He responded by wrapping his arms around her.  
  
"Can we go home now?" she asked timidly.  
  
He smiled and nodded. Hand in hand, they left the Moulin for the day, and a large audience watched them go. A few jealous sighs were heard from the can-can girls. Nini snorted.  
  
"Please! If you let yerself melt like butta at that, yer all pretty pathetic." Slightly hurt, most of the girls left to get out of their costumes. They didn't get the chance to see Nini sneak a longing look at the lovers walking out the door. "Wish I could get someone like that," she thought.  
  
And she watched the two walk to the day together, for the sun was shining brightly outside.  
  
*A/N* I know! Nini helping Satine? But being owned by the duke is just too nasty to think of, so of course she'll try to get out of it! lol R&R!! 


	12. Out of the Darkness... Reaching the sun'...

*A/N* Thanks to all that reviewed!! More reviews= more chapters! ehehe... I'm evil and I'll stop jabberin' on now... enjoy!  
  
The elephant love medley is owned by however compiled it, and Ewan McGreggor and Nicole Kidman sing it. (Basically it's not mine :P)  
  
Out of the Darkness... Reaching the sun's ray  
  
The sun was setting slowly, and a sole spectator watched alone in Christian's garret. She hadn't spoken to him since they returned, and she hadn't moved from her spot. Watching the sun was the only thing keeping her mind off the duke.  
  
From his spot on the bed, Christian watched her sadly. She hadn't been herself since she'd been found, and he was really missing the Satine he knew. Christian felt guilty about his thoughts, but more and more he found himself wishing this Satine would disappear the real one would return.  
  
He caught himself before the wishing began. Christian looked at his beloved sitting alone on the windowsill. She was alone, scared and depending on him. Ashamed at his previous thoughts, he focused on the love he had for Satine, this one as well as the "other". They were, after all, the same person.  
  
"Are you sure you're alright?" he asked her quietly, the guilt fresh in his mind.  
  
She didn't respond but contented herself to coo at a sparrow hopping on the windowsill. "What a pretty bird..."  
  
Christian walked up to her and grabbed her arm gently. "Satine, are you okay?" he repeated. She avoided his gaze and didn't answer. He cupped her chin and their eyes met: his were filled with concern, and hers with tears.  
  
"Talk to me! Tell me what's wrong."  
  
She pushed away from him and began pacing about the room. Her hands fumbled restlessly as she paced, back and forth.  
  
"What's wrong is that I'm humiliated! Everyone saw, Chris! They all know what a weakling I am! And no thanks to you, I crumbled when I promised myself I'd stay strong and he punched me in the face and I practically let him do it. Just like before, I let him do what he wants with me and I don't know why and he just has his way with me and I don't lift a goddamn finger! So no, Christian, I'm not okay!"  
  
Christian's stupor lasted only a moment. Not only did she swear, she spoke so angrily that he almost didn't recognize her.  
  
"No thanks to me!?!" he exclaimed in disbelief. "I distinctively remember jumping the duke because he punched you in the face! And don't you dare say you let him do it because you don't care! I won't let you talk about yourself that way!" "I'll talk about myself in whatever manner I please, Christian! And I distinctively remember you gaping stupidly at the duke while his fist collided with my face," she retorted hotly, not caring about the fact that she was yelling.  
  
"Gaping stupidly? I was terrified because I happen to love you and I didn't want you hurt again but obviously that doesn't mean much to you!" Christian yelled back. "The woman I love died a long time ago, and all I can think of is wanting her back, but I can see it's not going to happen."  
  
In his anger, he was glad his words struck home. But it all melted away when she didn't yell back at him and simply looked at her feet. He hurt her. As much as he promised he wouldn't, he did. And the guilt enjoyed tearing him on the inside.  
  
"You were supposed to protect me," she murmured sadly. He rushed to her.  
  
"I know, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean any of it..."  
  
She looked up at him and smiled her first real smile in a long time. "Can we stop fighting?"  
  
He nodded, his forehead touching hers. Smiling, he kissed her nose playfully. Satine laughed happily and draped her arms around his neck, while his encircled her small waist.  
  
"I love you," he said, and to his surprise, her eyes twinkled mischievously. Their lips suddenly met for the first time in months.  
  
And it felt like the first time.  
  
Lightheaded and blissfully giddy, they pulled apart, but didn't let each other go. "I love you too."  
  
The sun's rays danced in the garret and played on Christian's face. Satine reached out to touch one of them. He realized that she was back to her old self again.  
  
"I missed you," Christian said.  
  
"I'm glad to be back, but the other Satine's got a thing or two coming for you," she replied, trying not to laugh.  
  
Feigning fear, he whispered in her ear, "we'll just have to keep you bother busy." Christian swung her around and, to the sound of the song that brought them together, they danced the night away.  
  
"I was made for loving you baby and you were made for loving me."  
  
"The only way of loving me baby..." 


	13. Out of the Darkness... Nothing to Fear

*A/N* I NEED reviews like I need air! It's becoming a problem!! So please, help save the sad, sad author by reviewing her stories!!! I have a problem, I know...  
  
Out of the Darkness... Nothing to Fear  
  
The cool morning air tickled Christian's uncovered body. In his groggy state, his hands flew around in an attempt to retrieve the lost blankets. He smile, self-satisfied, and turned to his side sleepily. "Another mission accomplished," he thought, not quite aware of how foolish that sounded.  
  
Christian's arm reached over the person laying next to him. They're renewed relationship was ten times more intense than before, and ten times as strong. The joy he felt couldn't be expressed into words. But she wasn't there.  
  
Confusion registered quickly in his mind as he shot up. His eyes scanned the room and settled on the cause of his worry. Satine was alright; she was sitting at the windowsill, in their garret where she belonged.  
  
Christian looked outside. The sun had barely begun to warm the sky. Satine had never been a morning person, and waking her up early was a deadly thing to do. Yet she rose before the sun today.  
  
"Another nightmare?" he asked groggily, rubbing his tired eyes. She nodded, still looking out the window.  
  
He dragged his feet in her direction, bringing the blankets with him. As Christian's arms enveloped her, he noticed she was hugging her stuffed bear. He smiled.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine. It wasn't that bad..." she reassured softly, relaxing into his embrace. He was warm, and the sun hadn't had the time to exercise it's power...  
  
Satine looked up at him. His beautiful eyes were filled with concern, his chin had a slight stubble, and his hair was adorably disheveled. She kissed him.  
  
"Come to bed with me? It's cold out here..."  
  
Christian was too muzzy to notice what that suggestion could have meant. Satine smiled at him and told him to go warm up the bed. He scurried to it and sat down.  
  
Casting one quick look out the window, Satine got up... and screamed.  
  
Christian was by her side in less than a heartbeat. "What is it? What?" And then he saw.  
  
"Oh my God..."  
  
Christian wrapped his arms around Satine protectively. Disgust and shock filled him as he stared out the window.  
  
The duke stared back.  
  
In the middle of the street, amongst the early-risers of Montmartre, the duke stood, staring into Christian's garret. Or to be more precise, through the window, at Satine.  
  
The burst of the door made them jump. Toulouse stood in the doorway and looked at the lovers; Christian around her protectively (as usual) and Satine clinging to him fearfully with a blanket surrounding them.  
  
"Toulouse! What... what are you doing here?" Christian asked when the drumroll of his heart lessened.  
  
"I heawd a scweam. Is evewything alwight?" Concern for his friends shone through and comforted them both slightly.  
  
Satine pointed out the window. Toulouse bustled over and scanned the streets. "Thewe's nothing thewe..."  
  
"The duke was standing there a moment ago!" Christian exclaimed and joined his friend. The duke was gone.  
  
"Well... I'll be going... If you nweed anythwing... Bweafast later?" the dwarf excused himself, sensing the lovers needed some time alone. They nodded at his suggestion for breakfast together later on, and he returned to his room upstairs.  
  
They cuddled on the bed, not wanting to be anywhere near the window for now.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine," she reassure. "In fact, I'm ready to go to bed with you now."  
  
Christian's confusion made her laugh. "But... we are on the bed."  
  
She stared at him, deadpanned. "That's not what I meant."  
  
"Oh," he said, not quite understand what she DID mean. She leaned over and kissed him passionately. "Oohhhhh..." Christian voiced, finally catching on. She smiled mischievously and they fell on the bed. The duke was forgotten for the rest of that morning. 


	14. Out of the Darkness... You're here with ...

*A/N* I'm on a Pink kick, and I realize I haven't used songs in a while sooooo...The songs Just Like a Pill, Numb, Eventually and Lonely Girl are by Pink. (there's a first... I know the song titles...)  
  
Out of the Darkness... You're Here With Me  
  
The duke was forgotten for the rest of that morning. Or so Christian thought.  
  
Satine kissed him passionately and they sunk onto the bed. He began leaving a trail of kisses from her ear to her collarbone, and she gasped, in what Christian assumed was pleasure. His hand climbed up her leg and under her robe. She stiffened, screamed and rolled off the bed.  
  
Christian sat himself up, dazed, and his passion immediately forgotten. She never had any problems before... Even after she returned from the duke. She was the one who re-initiated their sexual relationship!  
  
Satine curled herself up in a tight ball and rocked herself back and forth. Puppy-like whimpers emitted from her shaking body. Christian couldn't understand why.  
  
"Please don't hurt me... I'm sorry... Please don't..."  
  
She thought he was going to hurt her? Christian felt a pang of betrayal in their trust. But she hadn't acted this way before... What was going on?  
  
"No sleep, no sex, for you from you ex-girlfriend  
  
I was too deep, can't let you come and just jump in.  
  
At times I would, push my feelings aside to let you feel.  
  
I'm novacaine,  
  
I'm numb and nothings real...  
  
Like the coldest winter  
  
I am frozen from you..." Satine whispered-sang from her fetal position on the floor.  
  
She wasn't ready, Christian suddenly realized. But she started it... so she did it for him? He didn't understand.  
  
"I lay there quiet  
  
And watched you have your way with me.  
  
I might have cried  
  
But the tears were silent inside you see..."  
  
Christian felt like a bucket of ice water was dumped on his head. She hadn't fought back for the duke, why would she for him? She wasn't ready, and he took advantage of it... She felt like he raped her.  
  
Tiny beetles began crawling up his arms, under his skin, filling his body with black mucus. He felt sick. His ears were ringing painfully; he was dizzy. Like a far away echo, he heard Satine's voice again.  
  
"I was weak before  
  
Now you've made me so numb I can't feel much for you anymore..."  
  
"She hates me..." he thought, disgusted with himself. He tried to scratch the beetles off. They didn't budge, but instead clouded his vision. He felt himself fall to the ground. "What have I done?"  
  
He had to find a way to make Satine understand that he didn't know... "I didn't know..." he heard himself say. His voice sounded strange to his ears.  
  
Christian's hand reached a round, metallic button; his typewriter. She needed to know. He couldn't speak. He typed a few scrambled letters. He couldn't see; the bugs were crawling all over his eyes. He couldn't hear her sing; the bugs were crawling out of his ears.  
  
"Where I can run..." he tentatively tried to type. His heard hurt too much to think clearly. "To the fastest I can, to the middle of nowhere, to the middle of my frustrated fears..."  
  
"I'm crying here, what have you done? I thought it would be fun..." he heard Satine sing. Black tears rolled down his cheeks.  
  
"I didn't know the price," he typed. "So what good am I to you?" The words were coming faster and faster. His fingers could barely keep up. "Staring at the cracks in the wall, 'cause I'm waiting for it all, to come to an end. Nothing is ever enough... Ooh baby it ain't enough..."  
  
When was it all going to end? Christian was at the end of his ropes. He didn't know what to do anymore, or what she wanted him to do. He didn't realize he was still typing. His fingers were burning. He slid off the chair he didn't realize he was on. Satine was still crying in a corner. It was more than he could take.  
  
Christian imitated her position and held his head in his hands. The tears he was holding in fell like rain from the sky. They both cried themselves to sleep.  
  
*A/N* This is for Mariclaire, who reminded me of an extra chapter I wanted to write but got lazy (basically, this one). So thanks! And hopefully this will make more sense to everyone. 


	15. Out of the Darkness... You're finally fr...

Out of the Darkness... You're Finally Free  
  
The Moulin Rouge was bustling with excitement. Today was the first dress rehearsal for Christian's play. The actors were in their costumes and waiting in the dance hall for the writer who hadn't shown up yet. Harold and Mary were grumbling angrily beside them.  
  
"Where are they?!" exclaimed Harold impatiently.  
  
"They're probably busy in bed," Mary answered him, smirking. Harold shot her a look that suggested that this wasn't the time to make jokes. His lips nonetheless curved upwards in a knowing smile.  
  
"Maybe I should go interrupt..."  
  
Harold exited the Moulin, shaking is head. Who would have thought the poet would be late for the dress rehearsal of his play? However, Satine could be very distracting... And since their relationship just got back on track...  
  
Christian's garret came into view. Harold automatically knew something was wrong since the door was thrown open, and no sound was coming from inside. Harold broke into a jog.  
  
He peered through the doorway and received the shock of his life. The room was completely trashed. Chairs were overturned, the table was flipped over, papers had flown everywhere, and Christian's typewriter lay broken on the floor.  
  
"Oh my goodness..."  
  
A moan of pain emitted from the floor on the opposite side of the bed. Harold ran to Christian. The poet looked at Harold, dazed and confused, but couldn't bring himself to talk.  
  
"Where is she?" Harold demanded. Satine was nowhere in sight.  
  
Christian reached up to rub the back of his head. He felt a sore bump through his tousled mane. His brows knitted in confusion; he didn't remember hitting his head...  
  
"Where's Satine?" Harold demanded more forcefully.  
  
"Satine?" Christian worded. Once he realized what Harold was asking, his eyes shot about the room in search of her. Instead in found his garret in complete chaos.  
  
As much as Harold didn't want to admit it, the duke had returned. And he got to Satine again. "Dammit! You were suppose to watch her!"  
  
He lifted the younger man up swiftly. Christian became panicky.  
  
"She was right there! In the corner!"  
  
"What was she doing in the corner?" Harold asked. Another nightmare perhaps...  
  
"She... She was crying..." Christian's shoulders slumped as he recalled the morning's events. "It was my fault... I shouldn't have let her..."  
  
"It doesn't matter know," Harold waved off. "You have to find her. She's depending on you!"  
  
"No she isn't."  
  
Harold looked like he'd been slapped in the face. "What?!?"  
  
"She hates me! I'm no better than the duke! She said it herself!"  
  
"She... said you were no better than the duke. In those exact words?"  
  
The black beetles were threatening to take over again. Christian shook his head. "She said 'I was weak before now you've made me so numb I can't feel much for you anymore...', amongst other things... She felt like I raped her Harold. She's no better off with me..."  
  
Rage was beginning to take over Harold. He couldn't believe how quickly Christian was giving up on her! He was willing to let the duke lay his hands on her again, when Christian had the nerve to storm in his office and threaten him... He let them stay together against his better judgment, and he'd be dammed before he watched Christian throw it away because of that bastard duke. He'd be dammed before he let the duke win.  
  
Harold grabbed Christian by the shirt and slammed him against the wall. "She needs you. Whatever she said, it wasn't because of you. It was because of what happened before, because of the duke. And now you're willing to let it happen again? You're the only one she trusts... Don't betray her... Not when she needs you the most..."  
  
Harold knew it was true. She did need Christian. They loved one another, and he made her happy.  
  
Christian's eyes brimmed with tears as he nodded. "Where do we find her?"  
  
Harold let him go. He had no idea where the duke was hiding, but he was sure it was near Montmartre. "The duke bought a mansion in Paris for his stay in France. He's probably there now..."  
  
"Good. Now where in Paris?" Christian asked, feeling more hopeful by the second. It was soon crushed to the ground.  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"You don't know?!?"  
  
"He never told me where! I never asked!" Harold yelled. "But we can find her. You two have this connection... I've seen it work. You don't realize it but you're soulmates. I trust you Christian. You can find her."  
  
Christian closed his eyes briefly. His heart thumped in dread. He felt numb. And suddenly, he felt a sharp pain in his side. It was as if he was feeling someone else's pain. Satine's pain.  
  
He focused on that pain, and the once foggy imagery became clearer and clearer. Hills. He saw hills.  
  
"Hills." Christian voice the picture.  
  
"Hills?"  
  
"Where are there hills in Paris?" the poet demanded impatiently. Harold, slightly skeptical, offered to take him.  
  
"Don't worry Satine... I'm coming..." Christian whispered in his mind. A wave of fear and reassurance floated in his thoughts. They were soulmates, and it would save her.  
  
*A/N* Alrighty... I'm sleepy, so I'm not sure how this will sound... Tell me what you think anyhoo. Thanks to all those who reviewed!! (And diddly day, if ur reading this... I haven't seen you review in a while! What happened? You made that little number go up... :( )  
  
everyone plz review! even if you've done it before... ur opinion matters to me!! :) 


	16. Out of the Darkness... The End is Here

*A/N* I don't own the song Come What May, which is used here. Lonely Girl by Pink is also used.  
  
Out of the Darkness. The End is Here  
  
The room was dark, save for a thick stream of light emitting from the barred window near the ceiling. A musty smell reigned in the basement room, but Satine barely noticed. She was too engrossed in her lecture to pay much attention to anything.  
  
She sat in the darkest corner, hoping the darkness would hide her from the duke. She held a crumpled piece of paper and barely made out the words Christian had written her. He was sorry, he was disgusted with himself, he didn't know, and he loved her.  
  
Tears ran down her cheeks as she read his words for the thousandth time. She was sorry too. She hadn't meant to direct what she said towards him, but it was as if she got stuck in one of her nightmares and couldn't get out. Just like now.  
  
At the bottom of the page was their song typed from beginning to end.  
  
"Come what may, I will love you, until my dying day," she sang the words.  
  
The loud clang of the door made her jump to her feet.  
  
"Shut up!" the duke threatened from the doorway. He couldn't stand to hear that song.  
  
Satine let herself slide to the floor, shaking. She didn't stop singing. Somewhere in her mind, she felt Christian could hear her, and she needed something to cling to. Something that made her feel safe.  
  
"SHUT UP!" the duke yelled, his face turning red and his hair flopping over his eyes. He took a step forward and the light enveloped him. Satine saw the crazed look in his eyes, that first begun on the night in the Gothic Tower, and never left.  
  
His attention was suddenly diverted to the paper Satine was holding. She tried to hide it, but it was too late. He wanted that paper.  
  
"Give me that."  
  
Satine shook her head and held the paper close to her heart. She wasn't about to give up her security blanket to the duke.  
  
"Give me that," he repeated more furiously. She still refused.  
  
The duke approached her, and she knew what was coming next. "Christian, help me!" her mind screamed before the numbness took over.  
  
***  
  
"Christian, help me!" he heard in his mind as the words shook him awake.  
  
"Satine!" Christian screamed as he shot up. Where was he?  
  
The faint sound of horse hooves answered his silent question. He wiped the sweat off his forehead with his sleeve. He felt Harold strong hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Is she alright?" he asked, a little paler than usual.  
  
"He's hurting her," Christian answered, his voice breaking. He looked out the window in attempt to compose himself. What he saw, however, only served to further agitate him.  
  
They were nowhere near the city of Paris. He saw rolling hills, a blue sky, and immense fields. Not Paris.  
  
Christian turned to Harold, angry beyond words. "You're in this with the duke, aren't you!" he demanded. "You want her hurt. You want her away from me!"  
  
"No I'm not!" Harold tried to explain, while attempting to release the poet's hands from his collar. When Christian wouldn't listen, he pushed him off and bellowed, "LISTEN TO ME!"  
  
Christian was stunned enough to do as Harold said.  
  
"There are no hills in Paris, but on the outskirt. We're on the countryside, and I think this is where the duke's mansion is. It's peaceful and secluded out here, just like he would want it. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you distrusting yourself," Harold softened. "You're Satine's only hope."  
  
The two men fell silent. The only sounds were of the horse pulling the carriage.  
  
"Harold, I'm sorry," Christian apologized.  
  
"Don't be. We're all worried about her."  
  
A large, looming building distracted them from further conversation.  
  
"There it is," Harold whispered.  
  
They exited the carriage and advanced slowly towards the mansion, gaping. It was the biggest house either of they had ever seen!  
  
"How do we find her in there?" Harold asked himself, almost angry.  
  
"I know where," Christian answered him, his voice ghostly soft.  
  
"You find her, I'll get help."  
  
Harold's words barely registered. He could feel her pain, and it was taking over his head. "Still I curl up, right under the bed, 'cause it's taking over my head, all over again..." he whispered. "Come what may..."  
  
Suddenly, he noticed the door was slightly open. "You're getting careless, duke." After checking if the way was clear, Christian slid through the opening quietly. There was no one in sight. Not even Warner.  
  
He navigated the house like he'd been living there all his life. He knew Satine was guiding him. The pain was gone, and was replaced by fear.  
  
Christian froze on his tracks. Footsteps were coming from the other side of the door he was about to open. He quickly hid behind a table and prayed the duke wouldn't see him.  
  
"Mine. She's mine now, Christian," a deranged voice whispered. Christian risked a quick peek. The duke was holding a crumpled piece of paper. "Mine."  
  
The duke left, leaving the door to the basement conveniently open. Christian rushed down the stairs to another door. This one was locked, with the key still in the bolt. Christian turned the key and the door creaked open obediently.  
  
Satine sat in the corner, rocking herself back and forth. Through her sobs, Christian could make out a song. Their song.  
  
"Satine!" he exclaimed, and she jumped.  
  
He rushed to her and gathered her in his arms while she cried. "Shh it's okay. I'm here now. You're going to be alright." He felt her nod against him as he rocked her.  
  
Tears of relief formed in his eyes. He stroked her matted red hair, grateful that she's still alive. She pulled herself as close to him as possible, and he enveloped her with his arms.  
  
"You're okay now. I won't let him hurt you anymore."  
  
Satine looked up at him, her eyes red and swollen from crying. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean what I said. It was like a nightmare and I couldn't get out and I didn't know what to do...", she rambled.  
  
Christian silenced her. "It's okay. It doesn't matter now. All that matters is that we're together again."  
  
She nodded and kissed him lightly.  
  
"I have to get you out of here," he told her urgently, remembering where they were.  
  
Christian helped her up, carefully avoiding bruises. Her face was once again scratched and swollen, as was the rest of her broken body. "Can you walk?"  
  
The door suddenly creaked shut. The lovers looked in shock at the person staring back at them.  
  
"You're not going anywhere, writer," the duke said, fingering the gun he held.  
  
Satine fearfully clung to Christian, who stared at the duke venomously. Before anyone had the chance to say anything else, a loud crash emitted from the first story. All three looked at the ceiling, listening to the herd of heavy footsteps.  
  
"Police!" they heard someone yell. Christian's heart leapt with joy. Harold had gotten the police!  
  
His happiness was soon extinguished once he remembered the duke had a gun, and was very capable of shooting them.  
  
"She... won't... be... mine..." the duke said, an unpleasant realization dawning. A crazed smile slowly spread on his face. His eye twitched.  
  
The footsteps were nearing closer; the policemen were in the room above the staircase.  
  
"I won't be caught," the duke whispered. He slowly lifted his arm.  
  
The army of footsteps drew nearer, down the stairs. The gun was now touching the duke's forehead.  
  
"I won't be caught... The end is here."  
  
He pulled the trigger. The creaky door burst open, revealing a horde of armed police officers, and Harold standing behind them. Satine screamed and buried her face in Christian's neck.  
  
The duke fell to the ground with a dull thud. The clatter of the fallen gun echoed around them. Harold, pale-faced, bent down to checked the duke's pulse.  
  
"He's dead."  
  
Two officers picked up the body and carried it outside. Christian simply stood staring, numb.  
  
"He won," he mumbled. "He was never caught."  
  
Satine cried against him.  
  
"It's all over now," he soothed. "We can go home. It's over now..."  
  
*A/N* As you might have guessed, this is... duh duh duh... the end! But don't worry, there will be an epilogue to explain what needs to be (and maybe a sequel... ehehe). PLEASE let me know what you think (of the fic and the possibility of a sequel). BIG thanks to all the reviewed (I count 79 now!!!!), you guys really brightened my day and gave me a reason to continue this fic. Thanks again!!! :) 


	17. Out of the Darkness... Into the Light

*A/N* This is the very last chapter (epilogue... whatever) of this story. I'm almost sad to see it go...  
  
Please note that I have no talent in english poetry, so Christian's poem is a sad attempt on my part... (Think this poem, except really, really good)  
  
** ** are for mind (telepathic) talking  
  
Anyways, there probably will be a sequel, but it might not appear for a while (I'm still thinking it over) and AGAIN thanks to all the reviewers! I love you guys!!! *tear*  
  
Out of the Darkness... Into the Light  
  
The faint ticking of the typewriter keys echoed about the room and roused her from sleep. Satine inhaled deeply, and without coughing, let out a content sigh. Her tuberculosis had cleared due to the country air during her abduction, even though she suffered the duke's abuse.  
  
Pulling herself up on her elbows, her eyes scanned the room. Christian's garret hadn't changed much since the day the darkness fell, and for that she was grateful. Things were perfect the way they were.  
  
Her eyes fell on Christian typing feverishly at the keys. Crumpled papers littered the floor around him, and he was completely enraptured in his work.  
  
**Morning!** Satine's thoughts cast at him. He stopped immediately and turned to face her.  
  
"Morning, love! I didn't feel you wake up," he answered, tapping his temple.  
  
Their bond had grown so strong after the duke died, they could feel each others' souls in their heads. Thoughts could be "cast" at each other's minds, emotions were felt mutually, and even apart physically, they were constantly together. They were now one.  
  
"You looked busy," Satine responded, sitting up.  
  
**Say hello to the boys for me,** Christian cast, picking up his mess on the ground.  
  
Satine rubbed her swollen stomach, cooing softly. Although there was no way to be sure, they instinctively knew Satine was carrying boys, and they felt the two hearts beat inside her. And there was no doubt in their minds that these children were Christian's, because they "felt" them appear.  
  
"What are you writing?," she called as he left the room to throw out the papers.  
  
"A poem," Christian answered distractedly. She heard a clank of dishes emitting from the kitchen.  
  
**Read it to me.**  
  
Christian appeared in the doorway, blushing of embarrassment. "It's not finished..."  
  
**Liar,** she cast. She knew he was. "What is it about?"  
  
Christian had never renounced to read something he wrote to her. Satine felt hurt, and somewhat worried; she knew Christian sensed it.  
  
"It's about... It's about what happened with the duke..." he mumbled, looking down. He didn't want to be the cause of her worry, but he didn't want to remind her of what happened.  
  
**Read it to me.**  
  
Christian looked at her, incredulous. He felt no fear, no shame, nor anger from her. Only the genuine wish to hear the poem.  
  
Shrugging, he grabbed the paper from the desk and sat on the bed, beside Satine. Strangely, his palms were sweating. He hadn't felt this nervous since he first met Satine! Maybe it was because he'd poured his thoughts and heart onto paper, describing exactly what he felt during Satine's recovery. Maybe it was because he was afraid of what she'd think of it. Or that it would force her to relive the events that caused them both such pain.  
  
She looked at him expectantly. **It's alright. It's over now.** He nodded slowly.  
  
"Out of the Darkness,  
  
Trapped without light,  
  
Soon the night's wings take flight.  
  
Chasing the sun,  
  
Drowning in fear,  
  
Now she knows I'm here.  
  
Give up the chase  
  
And take my hand.  
  
I smile and help her stand.  
  
One step from hell,  
  
Two to the day,  
  
Three, she reaches the sun's ray.  
  
You're here with me,  
  
Safe and sound.  
  
It's you I finally found.  
  
Nothing to fear,  
  
You're here with me,  
  
And now you're finally free."  
  
**Out of the darkness, into the light,** Satine added. The poem was perfect. Everything was perfect now. **I love you.**  
  
**I love you too. And you're right, everything is perfect.**  
  
Out of the darkness, into the light... 


End file.
